DEFORESTATION.

This post inspired by the one Ichiena recently my housemates friends came over for a visit***two of them to be exact*** . They both seemed like nice people if the fact that one was a nudist was to be over looked(they stayed for a week such habits are not easy to miss), the other was a shy lil individual who could cook a mean lasagna and i mean the kind that makes your mouth water after that first bite.

Since i was busy and coming home form the library in the hours of midnight and likes, i volonteered my room and was sleeping on the sofa. OK OK maybe it has something to do with the fact that for me to share a bed with another person i have to REALLY REALLY like them. Wacha i disgrees kwanza ebu.

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Mimi i have very good sleeping habits yani i lala on one side and when am turning am fully awake that ensures that;
A. I don’t kick.
B. I don’t hog the blanketi.

OK that’s all i can come up with now but it’s a long list, so when i actually agree to let some one into my haven they had better behave****and many dont****. Like zamani erm i mean we once had visitors and my lil sis had to share my bed with me and horrror of HORRORS i wake up feeling like i have a ngunia on me and i can’t move my legs, WAIT i can’t move my head well either LOOKI LOOKI there is a toe in my ear!!!! WTF!!!!. I KICKED so hard she went flying out the bed, the lil rooster had gone and turned my feet into a makeshift pillow and my face a resting place for her feet. Next thing i know there is a scream from the floor and some one jumps on me i was TWANGWAD aki the ngumis that kairetu can pack, the screams woke up kila mtu and i was from that day on, marooned on the couch when visitors came calling. END OF DISGRESSION.

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It turned out the mama who could cook really well was a nudist in waiting so one day as i was sleeping on my tinsy island i wake up coz someone left the kitchen tap running ***arrgg dont you hate it when a person does that***** and i as i dragged my lazy rump to go funga the tap who do i meet coming out of the bafu!!!!! the cook and she was pithecus, bilas, nada. Yours truly just chuckled to herself and walked on, then the pic registered in her mind, walked back and saw,What me thinks the longest untrimmed grass, futhi, call it what you may and proceeded to laugh her heart out. Si watu woke up to find out what the frukazz was about and viola kwanza my housemate screamed!!!!!! and her friend the nudist joined me on the floor.

When i was able to control my kicheko i asked her, why kwani she wants to beat borats stash of pubic hair, and she says ati she is scared of wembe!!!! and what about waxing? to this she paled and closed the bathroom door.

Anyhew mama it seems thought about our outburst and while in the bafu saw Nair, and after a quick read and finding out that it removes body hair in a max 3 mins proceeded to generously apply it to her Congo forest. She decided to read it as she waited for the 3 mins to isha and somewhere on the bottle she sees this;

"Caution: Do not use in irritated, inflamed or broken skin. Keep away from eyes. Should Nair touch the eyes wash thoroughly with lukewarm water. If irritation occurs consult your physician. Keep away from children. Nair can be used on legs arms face any where except in nose, ears, on breast nipples, perenial or virginal/genital areas."

She screamed a guttural scream and with the hair that was falling off so were her tears there was nothing that we said that consoled her ****it might have had something to do with the fact that we were talking between gulps of laughter***
So later that day off to the physician we went....